Where: Applebee’s 2 Weis Ln, West Hazleton, PA 18202
Time: 12:30 meetup/pre-lube. 1:30 circle.
Hash cash: $7!
Drybag: always.
On-On.
Tuesday, April 24, 2018
Trail #8! May 12, 2018
Hash cash: $7!
Drybag: always.
On-On.
Friday, April 13, 2018
DANCES WITH FOOLS! Trail #7!
Sunday April 8, 2018 . Tamaqua, PA.
So there I was... on the road early. Which was a mistake for various reasons. The biggest being that Sprint has no service in Tamaqua. I hadn't heard from the hare DANCING FOOL and wouldn't myself via phone for the rest of the day.
With this guy haring I didn't know what to expect. So I decided to grab a 30 pack of PBR and go to the local Boyer's Market for some orange food. Just in case.
The people of Tamaqua are a strange lot. I'm being nice. Imagine the people of Walmart. They all live in their own village. That's Tamaqua. Hang out at the local Boyer's sometime.
It shouldn't have surprised me that the prelube bar was closed when I got there. Google said they opened at 11AM. It was now 11:45. WHAT WHAT MUD IN THE BUTT and RUNNER GIRL showed up and tried to give me ice cream. What I needed was a beer.
SNATCH AVENGER and WETBACK MOUNTAIN appeared next along with T-BLOWNER. AARP, CUM SAIL AWAY and HARE TODAY CUM TOMORROW then some Reading wankers appeared and we needed a new prelube location. Left a note in chalk on the sidewalk to meet at the Pine Street Pub.
The Pine Street Pub is the sort of dark seedy bar the likes of us are not welcum. So we made ourselves right at home. CAMEL TOE YA HO helped by playing ABBA's "Dancing Queen" about 8 times in a row on the jukebox.
It was about that time that DANCING FOOL finally was able to get in touch with us through SNATCH AVENGER. He was out laying trail and would try to make it back in time for start. Which he was telling us for the first time was at Bungalow Park across town. The address of which is the same as a different place 20 minutes south and google maps kept trying to take us there instead.
Once we got our shit together and got over there we had a pack of about 28 half-minds and 2 of the canine variety. And the hare was magically there! In true Rogue fashion SCRATCH N STIFF was recruited to RA circle.
DANCING made some kind of noise and called it chalk talk and then told us we had to pick up trash on trail. Even handed out bags which the shiggy would later take care of.
We were off! Someone even carried Yolonda! #YOLO!
Down the hill past the pool and into the Odd Fellows Cemetery, then across 209 and uphill we went finding trail behind the High School stadium. SCRATCHY'S virgin JUST CHRIS found a metal parking sign still on part of a pole and thought it was a good idea to carry it on trail. He'd soon regret it.
Who knows where trail went after that because WANTS IT BAD and a few others were instructed by the hare to shortcut through the shiggy back down to 209 to intercept pack. The FRBs were already across the street and into/across the Wabash Creek. There we saw some genius bridge building attempts, failed jumps across the creek (you have to pronounce it "crick" up there) and some piggy back rides for JUST ALICE and JUST VAL.
Uphill again! At this point the hare's orange tape was getting confused with real hunters tape and pack started making up trail. Even DANCING wasn't sure. Somehow we ended up going the right direction. And finally reached the baseball field and a not very well marked BEER NEAR... at the hare's car!
BUSHWHACKER got JEWELS OF DUH NILE and BUKKAKE confused. We all marveled at the similarities and decided they must be twins. EXCOGI can tell them apart. I hope.
A few of us debated calling it a day and returning to the bar. Fuck them FRB's! But we're dumb too so we went back out and up the hills too. Uphill and uphill. Along some other cemetery. Uphill some more. Then more uphill. It dawned on me that this was a mountain. There were a bunch of holes in the ground and deep rocky ravines. No doubt the coyotes would pick our bones clean down there should we lose our footing.
DANCING asked me if anyone had ever been banned from laying trail in The North. I had to ask him if that's what he was going for.
Once at the top there was nowhere to go but down. Down towards the railroad tracks and the Little Schuylkill River. There was lots of sliding on leaves and falling down. This might have been the most dangerous part of trail.
At the bottom there was a self storage place and some sort of mark in flour. Some said it was a shot check, others said it was a tit check. No one could really tell. Onward! Now the urban shiggy. Complete with a playground check.
Somehow we were able to find the scarce street marks back to the park.
The FRB's had been there for quite a while. Luckily PACKS EM IN THE REAR had some beer packed in the rear of his car.
The visitors from Brooklyn, THE CLOTHESHER, ROCKO SUAVE and TRINITY EYEBALL CUMSHOT had arrived late. They followed google maps to that other address 20 minutes away. At least they got in the first half of trail.
It was pretty friggin cold so decision was made to go back to the bar and do religion there. The Pine Street Pub wouldn't have us (claimed they had a pool tournament) So we ended up at Hang Loose which was finally open.
JUG STAIN brought her offspring and SILENCE OF THE GOATS embarrassed herself with her potty mouth in front of them. EGG FUCKER's Cone of Shame was worn.
It all starts getting fuzzy around here.
After most people left, the bartender broke out a bottle of Rum Chata that was not Rum Chata and things got even fuzzier.
Fuckin' Tamaqua..
So there I was... on the road early. Which was a mistake for various reasons. The biggest being that Sprint has no service in Tamaqua. I hadn't heard from the hare DANCING FOOL and wouldn't myself via phone for the rest of the day.
With this guy haring I didn't know what to expect. So I decided to grab a 30 pack of PBR and go to the local Boyer's Market for some orange food. Just in case.
The people of Tamaqua are a strange lot. I'm being nice. Imagine the people of Walmart. They all live in their own village. That's Tamaqua. Hang out at the local Boyer's sometime.
It shouldn't have surprised me that the prelube bar was closed when I got there. Google said they opened at 11AM. It was now 11:45. WHAT WHAT MUD IN THE BUTT and RUNNER GIRL showed up and tried to give me ice cream. What I needed was a beer.
SNATCH AVENGER and WETBACK MOUNTAIN appeared next along with T-BLOWNER. AARP, CUM SAIL AWAY and HARE TODAY CUM TOMORROW then some Reading wankers appeared and we needed a new prelube location. Left a note in chalk on the sidewalk to meet at the Pine Street Pub.
The Pine Street Pub is the sort of dark seedy bar the likes of us are not welcum. So we made ourselves right at home. CAMEL TOE YA HO helped by playing ABBA's "Dancing Queen" about 8 times in a row on the jukebox.
It was about that time that DANCING FOOL finally was able to get in touch with us through SNATCH AVENGER. He was out laying trail and would try to make it back in time for start. Which he was telling us for the first time was at Bungalow Park across town. The address of which is the same as a different place 20 minutes south and google maps kept trying to take us there instead.
Once we got our shit together and got over there we had a pack of about 28 half-minds and 2 of the canine variety. And the hare was magically there! In true Rogue fashion SCRATCH N STIFF was recruited to RA circle.
DANCING made some kind of noise and called it chalk talk and then told us we had to pick up trash on trail. Even handed out bags which the shiggy would later take care of.
We were off! Someone even carried Yolonda! #YOLO!
Down the hill past the pool and into the Odd Fellows Cemetery, then across 209 and uphill we went finding trail behind the High School stadium. SCRATCHY'S virgin JUST CHRIS found a metal parking sign still on part of a pole and thought it was a good idea to carry it on trail. He'd soon regret it.
Who knows where trail went after that because WANTS IT BAD and a few others were instructed by the hare to shortcut through the shiggy back down to 209 to intercept pack. The FRBs were already across the street and into/across the Wabash Creek. There we saw some genius bridge building attempts, failed jumps across the creek (you have to pronounce it "crick" up there) and some piggy back rides for JUST ALICE and JUST VAL.
Uphill again! At this point the hare's orange tape was getting confused with real hunters tape and pack started making up trail. Even DANCING wasn't sure. Somehow we ended up going the right direction. And finally reached the baseball field and a not very well marked BEER NEAR... at the hare's car!
BUSHWHACKER got JEWELS OF DUH NILE and BUKKAKE confused. We all marveled at the similarities and decided they must be twins. EXCOGI can tell them apart. I hope.
A few of us debated calling it a day and returning to the bar. Fuck them FRB's! But we're dumb too so we went back out and up the hills too. Uphill and uphill. Along some other cemetery. Uphill some more. Then more uphill. It dawned on me that this was a mountain. There were a bunch of holes in the ground and deep rocky ravines. No doubt the coyotes would pick our bones clean down there should we lose our footing.
DANCING asked me if anyone had ever been banned from laying trail in The North. I had to ask him if that's what he was going for.
Once at the top there was nowhere to go but down. Down towards the railroad tracks and the Little Schuylkill River. There was lots of sliding on leaves and falling down. This might have been the most dangerous part of trail.
At the bottom there was a self storage place and some sort of mark in flour. Some said it was a shot check, others said it was a tit check. No one could really tell. Onward! Now the urban shiggy. Complete with a playground check.
The FRB's had been there for quite a while. Luckily PACKS EM IN THE REAR had some beer packed in the rear of his car.
The visitors from Brooklyn, THE CLOTHESHER, ROCKO SUAVE and TRINITY EYEBALL CUMSHOT had arrived late. They followed google maps to that other address 20 minutes away. At least they got in the first half of trail.
It was pretty friggin cold so decision was made to go back to the bar and do religion there. The Pine Street Pub wouldn't have us (claimed they had a pool tournament) So we ended up at Hang Loose which was finally open.
JUG STAIN brought her offspring and SILENCE OF THE GOATS embarrassed herself with her potty mouth in front of them. EGG FUCKER's Cone of Shame was worn.
It all starts getting fuzzy around here.
After most people left, the bartender broke out a bottle of Rum Chata that was not Rum Chata and things got even fuzzier.
Fuckin' Tamaqua..
On-On.
Sex-A-Sketch.
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